Another miracle.

I feel bad I haven't written this until now. But, we had another skull fracture... this time it was little Bryce. I had been making dinner for a neighbor when I had the prompting he was going to get hurt. He was crawling around my legs while I was stirring sauce on the stove. I buckled him in a bouncer chair and scooted him to the side. I felt the prompting again and realized Dallin was bouncing on his head -- sitting on the bouncer of course. So, I took the whole bouncer and put it up on the kitchen island - making sure it was in the middle with room to spare on all sides. Before I even made it back to the stove -- I heard the smack. Somehow his whole bouncer fell off (maybe tommie pulled it? maybe he bounced top hard and it slipped?) But he fell off still buckled in. The side of his head hit first and then the chair broke over on him and smacked his other eye. He didn't cry at first but just stared. i panicked -- yelled for james (who luckily had just gotten home) and just cradled his head. I was sick inside. It had only been a year since my CPS charges from Tommie were dropped and I just knew that Bryce had just fallen from too high. The bouncer keeps him a good 6 inches above the island too. We took him over to Matt porters and discussed our options. Matt agreed he did not look well and the swelling was getting larger. James gave him a blessing and we just felt like an instant late night trip to the emergency room wasn't right. I knew it would become a huge deal with CPS and worried that they would just take him away from us right then. I asked Matt what the hospital would do through the night and remembered from Tommie how much he hated being confined to those cribs. Basically, i held him all night checking his temperature and waking him up every 15-30 minutes. By 8 am we were at Dr. Milius getting skull x-rays ordered and by 3 pm we were in the hospital for CT scans and monitoring. Through it all we never even had to see CPS (thank you Dr. Milius) and got to hold Bryce the whole time. Sure enough, it was a fracture. But, a miracle happened. Because he was only 7 months old, he still had a soft spot on the top of his skull. The way the fracture went, it split up the side, toward his soft spot. A small triangle of bone held the skull from caving in and causing brain damage. The triangle is less than .05 of a millimeter. We let so blessed to think of our own "tender mercy". I know that Heavenly Father was aware of the details of my life, and protected Bryce that day. I think I needed the reminder that I have to focus on my babies, slow down, and enjoy those small times with them. I had started trying to volunteer to all the things people ask me to do and would allow the chaos of "trying to get things done" stop me from focusing on them. It sounds weird, but if I don't have "anything to do" -- meaning anything extra besides cooking, cleaning, the usual...I am just happier. I can focus on them, move at their time frame, and never have moments where everyone is screaming AND i'm getting mad. Sure there are times where everyone is freaking out at the same time, but I am able to maintain my cool and calm them down faster when I'm not stressed with things I have to do. So, that day changed my attitude and ever since then, I quit doing things for other people! I say no when I need to, and don't volunteer for extras right now. I still TRY to visit teach, fulfill my ward missionary responsibilites, and teach RS. But, I don't really do anything else.  Every day I ask James "what's one thing I can do for you today?" sometimes it's laundry, but mostly he says "nothing- just play with the boys". And I do! And, I feel so much happier to just focus on what they want. We go to the library when they want, play group when they want, eat lunch when they want, lay on the couch when they want, etc. I can't believe how much more peace is in our home all because my mind frame switched. And looking back, Bryce has always taught me that lesson from day one. He came with such a feeling of peace, and knowing that "nothing else matters". I knew that he needed to be here to force me to give all my energy to them every single day. But, not only that, but to feel totally fulfilled every day that I am doing all that i need to do. I don't feel like i have "lists" of things to do nor that i never have time to get it all done. Sure, my house has gotten messier and i've had to relax on the cleaning regimens. (Please, don't look behind the blinds, in the couch, or at the carpet stains! :) ) But, I have never ever been more happy.

this picture shows his fracture. Son't get confused by the large growth lines marking the different plates. 

On the left you can see how swollen his head was. And man, did it get huge. But you can also see a tiny finger- like. triangle piece of bone, reaching out and protecting his brain. No swelling or blood inside the skull. 

Dallin

I want to take a minute and just talk about Dallin. Sometime he gets pushed aside in my life, but I am in love with this little boy. He is the best! He is very serious and doesn't laugh as often or as easily as my other kids. He sits aside a lot and just watches people and thinks about things.  I think this is why he is starting to seem so much older. Everyone is always shocked when I comment that is just barely 18 months this week. 

He is sensitive. When you scold him or he thinks I'm mad, he just gets genuinely sad. Doesn't cry, just looks at me. This picture captured it perfectly. 

When he gets scared, he just drops to the floor. He plays in the front a lot, runs in the road, and if he sees a car coming, he just sits. Scares me to death. But, funny at the same time.  He has been my earliest talker and says several phrases. "that's my bike", "i want apple juice", "STOP!" < That's his favorite. He says "mom" over and over. As annoying as it sometimes, I love it. His other favorite word is "what?". This started because it's tommie's habitual response to anything you say to him. But, Dallin's is a sweet "What?" and i like it way more. :) He is way loud at church, but polite in what he is saying. "more crackers mom? mom, please?". I sent him to nursery a month early. I just couldn't handle doing it all while James taught sunday school anymore. I was always in there anyways...trying to nurse while on the ground. Sis. Farnsworth was nice enough to just take him for me and it was the smoothest transition. Thanks to Tommie being in there, he never cares that we leave. I am recognizing this is a major advantage of having kids so close in age. i am so lucky they spend most of their day together playing and not fighting.  He idolizes tommie but doesn't try everything tommie does yet...thank goodness! They are best friends, and I love watching them together. 

Sometimes he climbs out of his crib, or Jackson will get him out. He will come to the side of my bed and not say anything. It sometimes takes me a while to notice him, but I love the way he peeks over at me.  It seems like it took him forever to learn to sleep good on his own. Now he is perfect...goes to sleep on his own, takes long naps and sleeps in later than the other kids. He sometimes wakes up screaming, i think he must have bad dreams, but he'll go right back to sleep if you tell him it's ok and give him a binky. Sometimes he tells me he's tired... "mom, bed mom". So cute. 

 


 He is very creative in finding ways to help himself. Sadly, this could be because I can't always give him the attention he deserves. He pushes chairs around everywhere, climbs up to eat food, get drinks, etc. This makes him seem so old to me. He reminds me so much of James when he eats. Totally engrossed in the experience... looks over the food first and totally enjoys it.  He still loves his "Dee-dee" pinky and always has one in his hand, pocket, or mouth. If he happens to lose that, he goes straight to Bryce and steals his.

He will sit in the swings FOREVER at the park. He loves it. But, I am terrible at being a good pusher. I get so bored and hate standing there holding another baby. When he is not swinging, he going down the slide over and over by himself. Cute to see that he smiles to himself every time too. 

First ice cream cone. Next time, we won't give it to him in the car. Huge mess! 

January- the month of NEVER leaving the house. :)

Somehow we had a terrible virus that lasted at least 6 weeks. Even James had pneumonia from it and missed several days of work. I don't think our whole family ever went anywhere together the whole month. Not an exaggeration. And for the most part, it was me taking care of everyone. Oh well, these cute boys made it well worth it. 

Bryce is the best. So content all the time.  He has a way of following you with his eyes and head, and when you turn to look at him, his whole face lights up with excitement. I love when that happens and wish I just had more time to sit and snuggle him. At his 2 month check up, he was still barely 11 lbs and 24 inch long. I love that he is tiny. So fun to have such a little boy. 

One day while driving in the car, Bryce kept coughing like crazy. This was nothing new thanks to the illness we all had. But, I started thinking about how terrible it sounded and just wishing everyone's coughing would stop. When I got home, I discovered patches of this all in Bryce's hair. Turn out, Dallin had been shoving skittles in Bryce's mouth and the coughing was actually choking I'm sure. Shaela had given dallin a few skittles before we left her house. I said yet another prayer of gratitude that Bryce did not die that day. I had no clue the coughing was anything abnormal. :(

We had an adult's only dinner at Macayo's for Shaela's birthday. James stayed home with the sick kids while i went. It was still one of my highlights from January and i loved being with all my family. Brad of course kept giving shaela all the attention ....and shaela of course loved every minute of it. 

The weather was just beautiful. I spent so much time outside, just letting the kids play. James did an amazing job on our winter lawn... front and back. We laid in that grass every single day. 

 Tommie was really into climbing on everything. I would find him in the most random places, just laying there quietly.

This story still makes me laugh. I wish had a close up picture of just how big the worms are in Jax's jar out there. We had a few days of crazy rain. Busted our roof even.  But, our driveway, and brent leavitt's driveway were COVERED in tangles and tangles of the fattest worms. And to think that james and Brent thought their worm farm and died off! The worms all seemed dead in the containers they had. But, lo and behold, the worms and multiplied and replenished both our yards. When the neighborhood kids discovered it, they swarmed our houses gathering jars of the biggest worms. We were the "cool house" for once. ;) 

Christmas 2014

It's well past Christmas, but I wanted to record a few thoughts from those past few months. This was my 3rd year in a row to have a small baby at Christmas time. I felt exhausted and overwhelmed a lot of the days. But, I felt truly happy. Happier than I've ever felt in my life. We had a really bad year financially-- so many things to pay for, so many things break, car problems, etc. Every month was a struggle to make ends meet. But, every month it worked out. Even with a little extra for Christmas. I felt so loved that Christmas. Not just from my Heavenly Father, but from family, friends, and my boys. Jackson was so into the "magic" of Christmas- the decorations, the suspense, the activities. It was fun to always go along with his ideas and talk about how exciting Santa is. Tommie and Dallin were old enough to get excited for the different activities and just be happy doing whatever. It was a simple christmas but so special. Both James and I remarked that even though our year had felt so challenging and frustrating, we felt so incredibly blessed. We knew Heavenly Father had looked out for us more times than we could count. 

Hiking hole in the rock on Christmas Eve day. 

Obviously the kids favorite part was all the ducks swarming our picnic lunch.

For 2 years in a row, we have had Christmas Eve with a fire pit in the back yard. I added some glowsticks as a present to open and the kids had a blast. Who cares if it looks more like new years eve? :) 

Our earliest Christmas morning yet ... 5:30 wake up from tommie and jax. 

Our Anderson family party was a hayride through lehi with a hot dog roast at the end. It was SO much fun.

We were also lucky to spend some time with Neil and Megan and their kids. They came for Spencer's farewell talk in our ward. I loved that both Jax and Kade had ugly star wars pjs - both hand me downs from neighbors :) These boys got along so good - I haven't forgotten how they used to fight :)  It's crazy to see how alike they are now.  

Bryce's baby blessing

Today, Bryce was blessed. It was the same sunday that Spencer gave his farewell talk. It works out great to have Wilford and Neil in town as well. Honestly, it was a chaotic sunday for me. I remember as James started the blessing, he was saying that Bryce has such a calming influence. I was by myself on the row and Dallin and Tommie were full out wrestling and yelling at each other while Jax is mad they are kicking him. The crackers they were fighting over were getting thrown everywhere. I remember laughing out loud while trying to get my boys to calm down. I tried really hard to catch the blessing but it wasn't happening. I am so grateful Kathleen emailed me the notes :). I hope that's not an omen for bryce's life. But, I love that he is willing to put up with it all. I also love that Bryce was blessed to understand truth. He somehow makes me think about what really is important every time i am alone with just him. 

Notes from the Infant Blessing given to

Bryce Clayton Andersen

Dec. 28, 2014

Mesa Vineyard Ward, Mesa, AZ

Dear Heavenly Father, by the power of the Melchizedek Priesthood which we hold, we give this baby a name and a blessing.  The name we give him is Bryce Clayton Andersen.

Bryce, We are grateful you are here at this time.  We bless you to know that your Heavenly Father has sent you here to do special things. 

We are grateful for the peaceful feelings you have brought into our home and for the calming influence you have upon your parents and siblings.

We bless you to know of our love and gratitude for you at this time. 

We bless you to be a leader among your friends and family.  People will look up to you as an example and for your calming influence. 

We bless you to use this influence for good.  We bless you that through your influence you may bless others around you. 

We bless you to have a seriousness about the gospel.  We bless you even at this early time with a desire to keep the commandments and covenants of God.  And because of your obedience, we bless you to be able to return to live with your Heavenly Father.

We bless you to have the strength to avoid temptation.  We bless you with sound understanding.  We bless you that your mind will be able to understand truth.  We bless you to gain a knowledge of the principles of the gospel and of secular knowledge.  We bless you that you will learn and grow. 

We bless you that you will be able to serve a mission and that you will bless those you come in contact with. 

We bless you that you will be married in the temple and make covenants and have the strength to keep them. 

We bless you to feel love for the Savior and gratitude for the blessings He has given you. 

We bless you with a desire to learn and understand the priesthood.  We bless you that you will see it as a gift and a great blessing to be able to serve others.  We bless you to be a blessing to those around you and that through your use of the priesthood worthily you will bless others for good.

We want you to know of our love for you at this time.  And we say this in the name of Jesus Christ, amen

 



Why is it so hard to just get a good picture? :)  Oh well, these show how the day REALLY went!

Spencer did such a great job on his talk. He seemed so old to me. I loved that he had a few days to spend with my boys again. Honestly, I started crying when I said goodbye to him. He will be a great missionary and is so lucky to go to rome. But, I recognized that I really appreciated all he did for our little family. I realized how much my boys looked up to him and how much I already missed having him live with us.